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April 20, 2014

Posts in "Overheards"

October 30, 2013

Overheard: Coburn Explains His Anatomical Reference to Reid

“My words weren’t appropriate, but my frustrations are real.”

— Sen. Tom Coburn, explaining the reason he referred to Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid as an “absolute” orifice on the backside of the human body at a Republican gala in New York on Monday.

The Oklahoma Republican was asked about it Wednesday on Fox News by Elisabeth Hasselbeck before a segment Coburn was doing on national parks maintenance woes.

October 29, 2013

Overheard: Mitch McConnell on Bigfoot

“Unsurprisingly, just 12 percent of Americans think the rollout has gone well. That’s less than 14 percent of Americans who believe in Bigfoot.”

— Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, speaking Tuesday on the floor about the health care law and Bigfoot.

October 24, 2013

Overheard: John Dingell Talks Ancient History, Literally

“I remind my colleagues, the last perfect law came off the top of Mount Sinai … written on a stone tablet by the hand of God. Note, nothing so good has happened since.”

— Rep. John D. Dingell, D-Mich., at today’s House Energy and Commerce Committee hearing on the rollout of the new health care law.

October 16, 2013

Overheard: FreedomWorks Bemoans Shutdown Bargain

“The line separating the Democrats and the Republican establishment is fading — it might have disappeared today. This is about Washington insiders versus the rest of America now.”

— incensed about the looming budget deal, FreedomWorks stokes the tea party faithful by redrawing the battle lines

October 8, 2013

Overheard: ‘Talk to Jay’

“I’m just going through my list, guys. Talk to Jay.”

President Barack Obama, referring any reporter complaints about who was being called on at Tuesday’s White House news briefing to White House Press Secretary Jay Carney.

By Jason Dick Posted at 3:16 p.m.
Overheards

October 2, 2013

Overheard: Homeless Not Exempt From Shutdown

“I know it’s a shutdown, sir. But you can’t be laying back down.”

— A street vendor trying to rouse a homeless gent dozing on a Capitol Hill sidewalk

September 24, 2013

Stockman: Democrats Want to Kill Infants

Rep. Steve Stockman is never one to disappoint when it comes to questionable tweets. Here’s the Texas Republican’s latest attempt to put the Senate debate on Obamacare defunding and Sen. Ted Cruz’s extended speechifying in perspective.

Stockman, it should be noted, does not always write his own tweets. They are often authored by his communications director, Donny Ferguson, who also has his own twitter handle @DonnyFerguson.

 

September 23, 2013

Overheard: Harry Reid’s Love of Grocery Shopping

“One of my favorite things I like to do in Nevada and here in Washington is to go grocery shopping. It is such a diversion for me. I love going grocery shopping to look around, buy things. Landra and I are without our children and our grandchildren — we live alone — but we still buy food and I enjoy that so very much.”

— Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid on the floor Sept. 19

September 18, 2013

Nothing to See Here, Says Erica Elliott

Erica Elliott, spokeswoman extraordinaire for House Majority Whip Kevin McCarthy, R-Calif., had the unenviable task of calming frayed nerves Wednesday, after the House community had been informed that plans for the foreseeable future had been officially flushed down the toilet.

Because Congress can’t figure out how to pass appropriations bills before the end of the fiscal year, the word went out around 3:45 p.m. that the House would be in session longer than anticipated.

“Members are advised that on Wednesday, September 25, the House will reconvene at 2:00 p.m. for legislative business with votes postponed until 6:30 p.m.  Members further are advised that the House will remain in session through the week, and possibly the weekend, until the completion of the CR. This is a change from the previously announced schedule,” the notice read.

Apparently, all hell broke loose, not that anyone enjoys finding out their schedule’s been thrown into a chaos of their own making. But the wording was a bit confusing, prompting some people to not be very pleased at all. Elliott sent out a missive a little while later, chiding everyone and, for good measure, she included a YouTube link to a scene at the end of “Animal House” that depicted mass hysteria, as well as a young Kevin Bacon yelling, “All is well,” before being flattened by the frightened hordes.

“To clarify all of the confusion and panic: The House was supposed to be out next week. Instead of being out next week, we will be in starting Wednesday. We will consider the CR before we leave this week. C’mon y’all …” her missive read, followed by the YouTube link.

So remember, as we get closer to a government shutdown and a possible worldwide economic slowdown: All is well!

After all, look how it turned out for Kevin Bacon’s character!

September 17, 2013

Mary Fallin’s Second-Chance Wish List | Overheard

Mary Fallin’s Second Chance Wish List | Overheard

(CQ Roll Call File Photo)

“Actually, I might focus on political science. I didn’t focus on that or speech or debate” — representative-turned-Oklahoma Gov. Mary Fallin tells a National Press Club luncheon about the skill sets she’d pursue if enrolling in college today.

July 26, 2013

Happy 24th Birthday to the Greatest Floor Speech of All Time

On this day 24 years ago, a spirited congressman from Illinois named Richard J. Durbin, now the No. 2 Democrat in the Senate, delivered what is unquestionably the greatest diatribe to ever grace the House floor — in defense of the wooden bat.

A young Durbin, still speaking with his strong Illinois accent, (as a Land of Lincoln lady myself, trust me on this; listen for how he says “pajamas” and “Americana”) was so riled up by the cheers of his colleagues as he hit the dramatic crescendo of his speech that he effectively dropped the mic when it was over.

Eat your heart out, Harry Reid, with your tired Davey Johnson metaphors.

“I don’t want to hear about saving trees, any tree in America would gladly give its life for a day of glory at home plate,” Durbin proclaimed. “I don’t know if it will take a constitutional amendment to keep the baseball traditions alive, but if we forsake the great Americana of broken-bat singles and pine tar, we certainly will have lost our way as a nation.”

May we mark this day every year to remember what America is really all about, and that even though it’s unclear who Durbin was addressing with this little ditty, aluminum bats have remained out of professional baseball for decades.

If we don’t take a moment to appreciate the glory that is the Durbin Wooden Bats™ speech now, in the heart of baseball season, then HOH has to ask, “Is nothing sacred?”

July 25, 2013

The Senate Judiciary Committee’s Locker Room Jokes

There was one senator conspicuously absent at the beginning of the Senate Judiciary Committee’s markup on Thursday morning: Charles E. Schumer. The committee was slated to mark up a media shield bill, sponsored by the New York Democrat and about 10 minutes into the meeting, the senator was nowhere to be found.

Since the committee was short of a quorum, members waited several minutes for a few more of their colleagues to show up.

A few minutes later, Schumer arrived, a quorum was reached and the committee promptly agreed to hold over work on the bill until next week. After announcing that the bill would be held over, Schumer said he had a “good dog ate my homework excuse” as to why he was late.

“The showers stopped working in the gym,” he said.

Judiciary Chairman Patrick J. Leahy responded, “When Sen. [Dianne] Feinstein was chair of the Rules Committee, that never happened.”

That garnered laughs from the rest of the committee, as Schumer is the current chairman of the Senate Committee on Rules and Administration and has jurisdiction of a lot of Senate operations.

The last thing that could be heard before Schumer’s voice was drowned out by the chatter of others in attendance was, “I had to have someone stand guard …”

July 15, 2013

Leader Reid, It’s Mark Sanchez on Line One

Hey, if Harry Reid can take a gratuitous knock at the University of Southern California football program, HOH can take a gratuitous shot at the New York Jets, amirite?

With that out of the way (sorry, Jets fans), we’ll get to the serious accusations the Senate majority leader launched against Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez’s alma mater — that they bought players! — which is sort of like that one time Mitt Romney paid an effective zero percent tax rate, except probably a little truer.

The Nevada Democrat spoke Monday morning at the Center for American Progress and made little to no news about the Senate’s filibuster standoff, but he did take a 20-second timeout to flash his sports acumen by making fun of a poor, unassuming intern from USC, who told the majority leader that he was mulling “switching sides” after Reid’s Trojan insults. Full story

June 26, 2013

The Capitol’s Gentleman Callers | Overheard

“Who’s calling my name? It could be any of these fine gentlemen.”

— Rep. Kyrsten Sinema, walking off the floor after Tuesday votes

The Squeaky Wheel Gets the … Insult? | Overheard

Man 1: “God, this thing sounds like crap.”
Man 2: “Yeah, I know. Taxpayers’ money.”

A pair of pseudo-engineers (photographing track features, debating Capitol Police procedures) chuckling about the state of the Senate subway system.

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