Roll Call: Latest News on Capitol Hill, Congress, Politics and Elections
October 1, 2014

Hello Kitty, Hello President

HOH swung by LivingSocial’s 916 F St. NW space to check out the Hello Kitty for President extravaganza. We entered confused. We left happy, wildly confused and weighed down by swag and paper crowns.

Hello Kitty, Hello President

(Warren Rojas/CQ Roll Call)

Our first question as we entered into the adorable red, white and blue cacophony: What is happening? And more importantly, why is it happening?

One of Hello Kitty’s spokeswomen told us this whole party is actually a victory celebration because the mute Japanese national is already our president.

“Our long national nightmare is over,” cheered one HOH reporter.

“When did this happen?!” asked the other.

A smiling Kitty aide told us to head upstairs for our makeover. ”You can get a ‘presidential eye,’” she said. “Or a ‘presidential lip!’”

“Please get a presidential lip,” one HOH-er said to the other.

“I still don’t get it, though,” she said, after giving him the presidential finger. “What’s her platform?”

“She’s running as the Friendship Party candidate,” he said.

“What does that mean?”

“What’s the only ship that doesn’t sink?” he asked.

“That doesn’t make any sense,” she said, securing her Hello Kitty crown over her curls.

It happened all at once. She saw a child getting a balloon animal. Teenagers were wearing red, white and blue flower rings made out of balloons.

“I don’t understand what is happening, and why do I want all of it?” one HOH reporter said to the other, dragging him to the photo booth.

In the gift shop, 100 percent of the proceeds garnered from sale of the campaign merchandise was being donated to Red Cross. Original art and tapestries hung from the walls.

“Is the president here?” an HOH reporter asked a spokeswoman.

“She’s taking a break. She’ll be back out soon.”

That’s when it hit this reporter: America’s first female president is an adorable Japanese cat with no mouth.

Hello Kitty, Hello President

(Neda Semnani/CQ Roll Call)

 

Hello Kitty, Hello President

(Neda Semnani/CQ Roll Call)

Hello Kitty, Hello President

(Warren Rojas/CQ Roll Call)

Hello Kitty, Hello President

(Warren Rojas/CQ Roll Call)

Hello Kitty, Hello President

(Warren Rojas/CQ Roll Call)

The Hello Kitty for President campaign headquarters will be open until Nov. 6. There is a big party Saturday featuring Biz Markie.

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