The Ron Johnson Facts of Life
Posted at 2:58 p.m. on June 18, 2013
At a Senate Budget Committee hearing Tuesday, Ron Johnson, R-Wis., shared his three top keys to succeeding in life, two of which involve sex and drugs, or the lack thereof.
Johnson was filling in for Budget ranking member Jeff Sessions, R-Ala., at a hearing with Education Secretary Arne Duncan about the department’s budget when he imparted the wisdom he usually reserves for students to his colleagues and the nation’s top education official.
“There’s no doubt about it that we all know that education is real key. We share that same goal that we want to make sure our children are armed with the tools to lead a successful and productive life. When I meet with students, I frequently cite the three things that if you either do or avoid doing, you’ll have a pretty good chance at leading a successful life,” Johnson said at the top of his remarks.
“The first of those is really make sure you graduate from high school. At least, you know, get as much education beyond that is going to dramatically increase your chances at being successful in life. And then of course, don’t do drugs. And don’t have a baby out of wedlock, you know, get married first. Just basically, follow those three rules, you have a very high probability of leading a successful life, so education is obviously important.”
So to recap: 1. get a high school diploma; 2. just say “no” to drugs; 3. no babies before taking the plunge.